I prefer riverbanks when I am sad
I prefer seashore when I am happy.
My days in those years never folded in without the blessings of rivers.
Wherever I went I searched for the flowing waters.
While looking at the stream, I feel deep relief.
They are like memories with no strings.
The sooner I reach the shore, the safer I reach my quietude.
One day while I was on my routine stay there, a boy entered there as a silence breaker.
He came with some friends.
I liked his energy level. He looked highly enthusiastic.
I used to see him there afterwards. As expected we became friends. Not just friends, but friends forever. I don’t know what makes our bond stronger. He consider me as his brother.
We talked seamlessly.
I felt sad when one day I saw him sat alone under a tree. His eyes conveyed the uncontrollable distress he was suffering at his heart. He lost his father in his childhood. The entire responsibility came above his thin shoulders. He didn’t get necessary support from his family members.
They tagged his entire efforts in a wallpaper named duty. So he hardly get a descent reception at his home.
One day he told me
“There is some mystery in human relationships. Some bonds never happen though we try our best to make it happen. “
He fell in love with a girl whom he know from his school days. He tried every possible ways to make her feel good. But there also he failed to win a nice attention.
“What was wrong in me?” he asked me.
I couldn’t find anything. In fact I felt that he is the most graceful and lovable man I have ever come across in my short life. His grievances made me more doubtful about human emotions.
We sat near the shore. In his presence I became the listener and he the speaker. I saw the comfort in his eyes when he got someone to hear him. I loved to be the listener whenever he has something to share with me.
One evening we noticed the absence of sparrows. We were friends with them. They shared their viewpoints when we found it difficult to solve the various complexities of human nature. We both loved their presence.
Our search took our attention to the other side of the river. Once it was filled with thick forest. Its density went in decreasing order as if the hair falls during recession time.
We later heard that those trees were going to a paper mill factory nearby. We both felt sad. I felt more sad as I had wasted too much paper during my clerical jobs.
In my childhood I often laughed at an old man who torn the posters wherever he saw it in walls. We along with adults in that time called him lunatic. Later I realized that he was doing a great job. In my village, people stopped sticking posters due to that old man. As a result the walls looked more beautiful and the paper usage in that regard got minimized.
There is a saying in The Holy Bible
“Judge not, that you be not judged" (Mathew 7:1)
It happened in my life exactly. I might have torn more papers than that old man have done in his entire lifetime. It was my mistake. I was careless. And his activity was a part of his protest to save trees. But I judged him badly.
Any how it was a sudden clash of thunder in my heart to minimize the use of paper.
I went to the river bank again after some years. I felt shocked, I felt upset.
There were no trees, no birds and no river also.
And one thing that made me feel more distressed was that I lost my friend, my comrade, my brother the beautiful river had gifted to me, in my long walk to salvation.
I have gained nothing.
I have earned nothing.
I lost everything.
I sat on the imaginary banks of that river in my memories.
I cried
“Bring me back my days of sunshine, my days of innocence, my days of love.”
